Sliding Doors Jaws

So, last night I visited A&E at 3 in the morning.

I managed to dislocate my jaw in bed(no, get your mind's out of the gutter.).

I had no clue how I did it, but it was fucked.
Anyway, on the drive to the hospital I managed to click it back into place.
The nurses at reception told me that it didn't matter and was best to check me over anyway, to be on the safe side and that.

A forty minute wait later, a doctor took one look at me and said "What are you doing here at this time in the morning, you're fine, go home."

So, I got home and although my jaw was back in place, it still hurt like hell.

Fast forward six hours and I'm in agony.
My cheeks are all swollen up.
It's hard to talk, hard to breathe, hard to swallow, and I can't close my mouth properly.

So, I book a trip to the dental hospital to see if they'll treat me any better there.

After a fifty minute wait, a dentist looks at me for two minutes, and tells me both of my wisdom teeth are coming through at the same time(which is rare, apparantly), that these popped my jaw out, and that my left gum is diseased.
Not bad for one nights work, eh?
So, after that two minute examination I get charged £10.64.
Then I get charged £6.40 for antibiotics.
Antibiotics which I have to take with water for a month, and can't drink alcohol with.
If these don't work I have to have my wisdom teeth removed.

So, I'm on cup-a-soup, mashed banana and milk for the next four weeks. Or more.

Which is gonna fuck my degree right up.